Thursday, September 13, 2012

DO YOU OWN YOUR ILLNESS?


Do you own your illness? Does it define who you are or what you are about? Do you think about the diagnosis you received, battle and hopefully have won as part of your daily life?
I hope there is more to a person than a diagnosis received.  Yes, it is a part of our life, but it is not who or what we are.  Speaking (writing) as a person who received a diagnosis of breast cancer 4 times, I know this is not ‘who’ I am or ‘what’ I am! It was a diagnosis! It was something in my body that I have removed, destroyed and will live my life everyday to the best of my ability to make sure it does not return. Do I think about it? Of course, often! Do I worry about it? I choose not to, what good will it do anyway? Thinking and worrying are two very different things.

We can put much of our energy into worrying but this is only negative energy and is not healthy, and will not change anything for the better. It has been proven that negative energy can have a negative effect on your health by lowering the immune system.  If we look into the future with positive thoughts, live for today and make plans for the future, then we are telling our bodies we will not accept disease- go find somewhere else to live! You are not welcome here!

This is how I choose to live my life. I take my health seriously. I do what is needed to be pro-active by getting checked twice a year (with Mammogram and MRI) along with self checks. I do my best to make healthy choices in the foods that I eat (organic when possible), the supplements  I take (many) to support a healthy environment and healthy cells. I exercise, I meditate as needed, surround myself with like minded-positive thinking people, take time for myself and I plan. I plan for the future because I ‘expect’ to be here, to do things and live my life the best that I can with my friends and of course, my wonderful family.  I find it difficult to be around people who focus on the negative, the “woe is me” person.  We all at some point in our life have or will experience difficult times. No one goes through life unscathed. Some maybe more than others  feel like they have more crap, but maybe that is just what is needed to appreciate the high times in life.  Whatever the reason is, we cannot question.  I believe no matter how much we may not understand when it happens, things do happen for a reason and something good will come from something bad. This is just how life works. One of my favorite books is When Bad Things Happen to Good People by Rabbi Harold S. Kushner.

The past couple of weeks I was surrounded by a great deal of illness of people who I care about. A girlfriend diagnosed with Stage 2-3 Breast Cancer, my brother hospitalized for a week, and a high school girlfriend who passed away. My girlfriend with breast cancer, 37 years ago I watched her battle Ovarian Cancer and today has a beautiful husband and adopted son who will be there along with her friends to support her through this and she has remained strong and steadfast.I am very proud of her!  Our high school girlfriend who has dealt with illness for many years, spent her days, enjoying life with her family, and hopefully it will be those wonderful memories that her daughter will hold on to now.   And my brother, who will rise again and find his strength, because that is what we do. Illness is all around us, there is no escape from it and there is way too much of it. It is a part of our life, but it does not have to define our life.

I believe it is ‘a choice’ one makes to live this way. Others who worry, will my disease return or what will be the next illness, they are not living life. They are living death; waiting for the next bad thing to happen.  I knew people who lived like this, and in the end, what they thought would be their demise, ended up to be something completely different, sometimes not even illness related but an accident.  The hours, days and energy spent worrying, is wasted, useless time and would be better off spent being put to positive use such as planning your next day off or vacation, or out for a fine dinner or shopping day, or spending time with someone you care about, anything that brings pleasure.

So how does one bring them-self to take away those negative thoughts and not become or own their disease, to take charge of their body and mind? There are so many options to list; Support Groups, Personal Therapist, Inspirational Reading or Audio Books, Humor Books, Friends, Family, a Pet, a Hobby, Exercise, Meditation, Travel, etc. Each person must find what works for them, sometimes a combination of the above, with trial and error and keep on trying. It takes great strength to control our minds, but you are strong, you have fought your disease, now you can fight for your life and your happiness.
You choose-your choice! I am not my disease. I am me, a positive, fun loving person with much more to offer to myself, my family, this world.  I am alive and so I am going to live. I invite you to join me.

Modah Ani-I Am Thankful
Editor; Vicki Singer Wolf, Co-Founder
In memory of Michelle (Shelli)